B.S.

I was just in the bathroom washing my face when I started to think about Brook Shields and her postpartum depression. It just popped into my head out of nowhere. I never read her book and I don't have kids but for some reason the thought crept into my psyche. Then I thought about Britney Spears and how many people say she might be suffering from postpartum depression as well. Then my mind wondered into, "I hope I don't experience that when I have children." Thats the last thing I need.

I had just finished reading an excerpt from a book I am currently reading called Wish I Could Be There: Notes from a Phobic Life by Allen Shawn. In that part he talked about how some children become phobic by imitating a phobic parent. I am thinking that is what triggered my thoughts on the 2 celebs.

Then I realized that Britney and Brooke share the same initials, B.S. and that both were in the media during there teen years for their vows to stay virgins until marriage and both were on the Oprah Show talking about the whole virgin thing.

The mind works in mysterious ways, doesn't it? Mine seems to hold a lot of B.S.

Until then...

Laptop

Oh, I ended up never receiving that laptop that I ordered by mail from the Popular Club Plan. I went over the credit they gave me. However it turns out it was for the better because my nephew emailed me to confirm that the specs of the laptop were very poor for the high price. Later on, my boyfriend surprised me with a laptop which he purchased with a portion of his income tax return.

So now I have a laptop. My boyfriend keeps saying its mine but I don't feel right accepting such a gift and he needs a laptop too so I share it with him...Its Ours!!

Good but belated news...

I found a therapist about 3 weeks ago. I had my 2nd session this Tuesday that just passed. I see her again the Tuesday after next because she is on vacation this Tuesday coming up. Anyway...I feel comfortable with her and feel I will stick to therapy for the long haul this time around. It is late...I am tired...I will share more later. I have been up working on my online magazine but my laptop is soooo slow and I barely got anything accomplished. Its a brand new laptop but it is soooo slow. I have to get help with that.

I want to lose 2o lbs by the 1st week of June...do you think that is possible???? Let me know. I am also going to do a mini makeover with my hair and clothes and accessories, etc. I want to look fab as I step into my 30's. Moreover, I had an interview for an apartment on Thursday and I have to fax over some additional documents...I hope I get this place!!! But in the meantime I am still searching...New York is EXPENSIVE!!!

Until then...

Hope!

I am feeling an incredible surge of hope today. I can't pinpoint exactly why I'm feeling this way. Maybe its because I'm listening to my new favorite song and music has the power to heal. ("When I see you" by American Idol, Fantasia) The rhythm in that song is soothing yet upbeat and optimistic!!! I love it. Its a love song but it makes me want to not give up on life.

A LITTLE OVER 1 MONTH LEFT...

I TURN 30 IN JUNE!!! I AM NOT AS FAR ALONG IN MY PROGRESS AS I HAD DREAMED. I NEED SUGGESTIONS FAST!!!