Today was one of my easiest days at work. It seemed like my anxieties were at an all time low. Maybe its due to the fact that I had about 4 lorazpams and some alcohol to soothe me. I usually get nothing out of the 2 but today they worked wonders.
I was on the phones all day and did not have time to come up for air but I made it through the day looking forward to my 3 day weekend. I am in limbo as to whether I should move back east or stay in the westcoast. It seems like the whole time I was here I yearned for the east and now that it is getting close to that time that I have to decide, I am in limbo. This job seems to be an opportunity for me to grow and maybe get promoted or just have opportunities to build myself as a career woman. However, I miss my family, I miss the city, I miss the east with a passion. I have had some bad experiences out here in the west but they were learning experiences more than anything. Maybe my wanting to go to the east is just another way of escaping just like I escaped when I came out here.
I confuse myself.
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